Heavenly rewards
Well, I’m honoured to have this blog site attached to a lonely website, esp. as I pay for the domain names. I should thus make use of it. This is one heck of a lonely site and it’s time to get a little pepper in it. Any ideas, dudes? I started writing a couple of books a while ago, but one sort of finished suddenly on its own and on the other I lost about 2,000 words and that was it for me.. end of story. It probably wasn’t on the right way anyway, but I was really proud of it. The first one was ‘Nature’s Child’ and the second one where I lost the words was called Madelaine and Jay. A love story and story of destiny between a couple and the blokes mother and a lost broach. Also the grandmother of the girl ~ Madelaine ~ who originally owned the broach and gave it to her granddaughter. A little like my own life really, when I think of it. Perhaps I was seeing into the future when writing it. I should perhaps put a little order through it and add some ideas to make it fuller and then it should be a pretty good book. but I’m kinda waiting for the time I’m happy to keep on writing on it. some parts are really intense (i find at least) and i appreaciate that i can write that kind of stuff. kind of woody, earthy and special in its own way. A gift, that’s what it should be at least, for the readers and those interested. Perhaps with a good cover pic and back writing. Initially i thought I’d be more the one to write about Zen or aromatherapy oils or the systems of nature, which i loved to think about and work out in my head. I did have a couple of great Zen books but that’s a loooong time ago! now things have changed. I’m more forced (which is what i probably chose unconsciously) to go back to thinking for myself and working things out for myself. that’s the true trick in life. once you stop thinking for yourself, then you kind of become a lost soul. that’s not what I want to be, by any means. Been there, done that. What i really would like to do is to let nature heal itself and heal me. relax. that’s probably the best way to do rather than to interfere and have a head f**** for the rest of your life! if you’ve been through any times you just didn’t have a chance to recover from, I mean. Which actually doesn’t happen to most of us. Sure some of us have crises, some worse than others. But truly life-threatening illnesses that cry warning signals of never healing, is a bit of a bummer. Cos sometimes there comes a stage where there’s just nothing you can do about it. so in those time, I guess, it’s time to just sit back and relax and breath the fresh air in your room. that’s what i’m gonna do. nothing more. and then perhaps a thread of creativity will rise from within me and I’ll be able to do one or two things I enjoyed doing once upon a time. and just stick to those. don’t get in a muddle and try to do too much. that’s just a bore and not the point. gentle concentration or pure creativity, like the zen mind. the simpler the better. i used to draw a little in my last flat when I wrote the book ‘Nature’s Child’, but that was just really crap. I was trying so hard to be creative, have creative thoughts and this was rather a necessity. I had no money and needed to find a way of earning some without being able to get a proper job (I gave up applying for jobs and getting no replies after a year and a half). so it was a need. it was forced and i don’t believe you can paint or do anything creative under pressure. I would also never sell my art. I don’t believe in that. which is why i never studied art. i would have loved to, but for the simple fact I could never have lived from it. i gave away too many pictures to friends and family, never sold a thing. but then again, I never was too good with money, nor business-oriented, as my fiancee always reminds me. my mom never taught me that and she herself never could manage her money well. but hey, then I’d be going on to the topic of my childhood and upbringing, which I won’t begin on. No. Door closed. Perhaps I should post an exerpt of my new book Madelaine and Jay here on this blog. if you want to read some, you will have to check by every now and then, which is my main aim here for the moment, as always checking into an unvisited blog is a very lonely and miserable thing! ;o)
Well for now, funky dudes, keep your chins up and don’t forget to check by next time you log in!!
Greetings, my friends,
röebok ;o)